Thursday, October 30, 2008

When You're Good to Mama

Dianne Wilkerson of the fabled Massachusetts Senate should take a lesson from Queen Latifah. If you're going to take cash from whoever, at least have some class! U-N-I-T-Y!

Dianne Wilkerson is not Michelle Obama, or What to Wear When Shoving Money in your Bra

Dianne Wilkerson at Fill-A-Buster filling her pockets with bribe money.

Dianne Wilkerson at the No. 9 Park restaurant shoving $1,000 dollars in cash into her bra. How ladylike!

Oh Sweet Jesus, Dianne Wilkerson, bless her heart, poor thing thought she was going to get away with acting like a fool. She probably thought she was living the dream, but instead she's been living a nightmare if you read of her past. I come from a politically corrupt-as-shit part of the country, and this story just warmed my heart, made me feel at home. I've been raging lately, thinking "I can't stand to be here, I hate these people," then I get to my office and see one of the crap-ass Massachusetts elected officials has FINALLY been arrested, and for taking bribes! It's like a hug from Jesus! And not that there can't be anything else to arrest people for...have you people been blind? You spent $22 billion to bury a few miles of highway in downtown Boston, and then name a park after Ted Kennedy's dead mama, plus it seems to leak like a sieve, and has, so far, killed a few people. So when are the arrests?

Regardless, I love it, I love it all, the scandal, the drama, the fiery speeches, the "I'm innocent, I'm a victim, the man made me a target...I'm the underdog, etc" rhetoric. I walked around the office, making sure people knew, and I laughed, I cackled, it was a good day. And THEN the always-a-mess Boston Globe published something interesting: the photos!

But apart from just making this a blog post about how Dianne Wilkerson is utterly insane and shameful (and entertaining), I felt it appropriate to make known, to the ladies out there, shirts that are more appropriate to wear when trying to shove cash into one's own bra or shirt. So, I simply went to the Macy's website and found a few shirts I feel would be better to wear when, and if, one decides to meet an undercover federal agent at Scollay Square on Beacon Hill or the fabulously-named Fill-A-Buster restaurant. It would only be better if she would have been found at Clink in the Liberty Hotel or at Cuffs in the Jurys Hotel.

Does this model look like a saucy, demanding bitch? That's right! "Give me money for my bra!" At least it's button-down, so easy access, very quick. So, ladies, consider something button-down.

I know, this skinny white girl needs a sandwich and a milkshake more than a pile of cash. Good lord she's skinny. But back to the shirt: while not a button-down, I think it would be easier to shove some quick bribe cash in the chest area--better than having to reach under.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Fall season in New England is so frickin' cute

I took a trip to Walden Pond this weekend. What else am I suppose to do in this town? And let's just say that I'm not a transcendentalist, nor am I a member of the Thoreau Society. It's a beautiful place, however, worth the trip, and the colors were great.

Site of Thoreau's 1-room cabin.

My new Ork Poster

Fresh from the frame shop is my new Ork Poster, one of my recent purchases I've made, that, in my mind, are doing their part to hold up the US economy. I was happy to see they have a lovely Boston Ork version, and I appreciate how they delineated the the city's many neighborhoods. So I apparently live in North Dorchester, or "NoDo" as some would say. Regardless, I like how the frame job came out, pretty simple.

8 minute chocolate cake

I found this recipe on the web somewhere, I *think* Smitten Kitchen, but I'm not sure. Regardless, it's online somewhere, so I'm not the genius or the freak who first penned this recipe. It's usually called "5 minute chocolate cake," but it takes me at least 8 to 10 minutes from start to finish.

4 tablespoons flour
4 tablespoons sugar
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
3 tablespoons milk
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 egg
pinch of salt

Combine dry ingredients, then add egg, oil, milk, mix together all crazy-like. Spray a coffee mug with non-stick spray (I used good ole Pam), pour in "batter" and then microwave on high heat for 3 minutes. After those 3 minutes, let it sit in the microwave oven for approximately 5 minutes, and voila, you have crappy chocolate cake, made from scratch (!), so enjoy! This isn't going to win you any award or kudos from anyone, but if you're alone and what you need isn't carnal, but rather caloric (and preferably chocolate), then this is your magic ticket.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

ULi: "Private real estate markets need to correct--lenders must force distressed owners to become motivated sellers"

Check out the Urban Land Institute's Emerging Trends in Real Estate 2009. The report makes this list:

Before a rebound, Emerging Trends says the following needs to happen:
  • Private real estate markets need to correct-–lenders must force distressed owners to become motivated sellers.

  • Debt capital needs to flow-–lenders will need to learn to deal in a more stringent regulatory landscape. The commercial mortgage-backed securities (CMBS) market must "reformulate."
  • Regulators need to restore confidence in the securities market. The government will insert itself into overseeing mortgage securitization markets. Systemic overhaul promises more measured debt flow.
  • The economy needs to improve. Falling demand for space won’t affect real estate markets severely until 2009.
  • The housing condition is no better and shows no signs of recovering quickly. For lenders, the "subprime mess is the tip of the iceberg." Stricter lending standards and the weak economy will continue to drain the homebuyer market. "Forget the quick fix!"
That's right, sweet babies, despite knowing that we can't trust most real estate and real estate finance professionals nowadays, I did take a moment to read through the linked article and found this list to be quite amusing. So, no shit, if you bought an overpriced house, there's no waiting anything out, you're fucked, so get over it. Life sucks for all of us.

And I will give the ULI kudos for recognizing the value, the importance, the goodness(?) of housing within existing urban areas near transit lines. Now I just need my main man Obama to throw some real bail-out style cash to Amtrak and this country's struggling transit systems, and stop building new highways every god damn day. Of course a new and improved transit system anywhere is only good if we wake up and review our land use policies, but sweet jesus, i'm on my way to brunch...

Richard Simmons has been representin' the Dirty South longer than that skank Britney

Wassup 2008

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Vive la Obama!

I love Barack Obama, I do. He's quite the stellar fella, to say the least. And I love these posters, and I loved seeing them posted in this fashion yesterday in Central Square. It makes me yell "Vive la Obama!" And they were really pasted well to the wall--it's not wrong to want to steal what is already illegal street art, right?

Monday, October 20, 2008

Vote! poster from Buy Olympia

I just got this great and FREE poster from Buy Olympia today. It's printed on what is essentially newspaper, but it was FREE, so yay. It's a cool poster, I say, and I've prominently posted it in my bureaucratic cubicle in hopes of inspiring someone to vote. Given I live in the bluest of blue states, but still, every vote counts, right? Regardless, it's a cool print, and I plan to keep this site in mind in the future.

"I need a Winn Dixie grocery bag full of money right now to the VIP section."

My fabulous coworker gave this shopping bag to me, knowing that I'm a true Southern Boy, and that I, in fact, "need a Winn Dixie shopping bag full of money right now to the VIP section." I love that she thought of me! And oh Lordy, Sweet Jesus, I wish this bag was full. I'll instead fill it when I'm makin' groceries at tha' Shaws or Hah-Vest. Regardless, see the video here.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

The Liberty Hotel's ugly carpet

Sweet Jesus, be a mirror! I understand that hotels can make numerous interior design choices beyond what any sane individual may knowingly and responsibly want for their own home, office, or anywhere. But why, Sweet Jesus, would such a fancy-schmancy place as the Liberty Hotel choose such god-awful carpet for their ballroom? Maybe they wanted carpet that would be more repugnant than the Back Bay MILFs and Cougars all preying on the youngish breeder boys in the lobby. Don't get me wrong, the lobby and central area of the hotel is beautiful. The food served at the banquet I attend was bad, bad, bad, bad.

Oh, and if you're in the bar there called Alibi, don't order anything, it sucks.

At the office...

A fabulous coworker wrote this post-it for me, to help inspire me. I'm not 100% sure it worked.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Sarah Vowell at Brookline Booksmith

Sarah Vowell is one of my favorite authors. Like many, I appreciate her humor, writing style, wit, sarcasm, and love of history and it's many unknown details. Her new book The Wordy Shipmates tells of the early Massachusetts Puritans. She read a few excerpts from the book at Brookline Booksmith in Coodlidge Corner and answered a round of questions from the audience. She tried to not dwell on the real premise of the book: how the early Puritans were just like crazy Americans today, insisting that God is on our side, that we're 100% justified in all our actions, etc etc. She hinted that her next book would be about the history of Hawaii, finding a connection between Hawaii and New Englanders and Puritans who, in the 19th Century, decided to "colonize" Hawaii, and so on. That will be quite the read! Oh, and she signed my copy of her new book--she writes big, too.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Give Me Your City Hall

I saw this today at the Harvard Square T station. I'm not sure what to think of these ads in general, but I like this section of one. If only aliens could descend onto Government Center and demand to take away Boston's City Hall Building. But would the city leaders then building some sort of Po-Mo crap city hall?

Moonwalks in Harvard Square

I took this picture last night while in Harvard Square. I more like the feet and hands (?) added to the fella, apart from someone showing us where to find the Moonwalks.