Regardless, I'm posting some pics for fun:
Not sure if this is the wisest bread-making technique, but I live in a cold Boston apartment, so the radiator was the warmest thing around.
Imagine my relief when I noticed the dough actually rising! I had not totally screwed up!
Behold, one of two very unremarkable loaves of white bread. It looks quite warm and delicious on the Fiestaware.